I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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