I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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