who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
