FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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