I wannas sexs uuuuu
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
only if we run a train.
done.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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