I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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