i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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