Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize