Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
