Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize
