Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I just made out with a guy for $7.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Randomize
