We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize