He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
