I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
