THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Randomize
