i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Success! We fucked roommates!
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
