quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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