He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
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