To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
