my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize