Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
