we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
