you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
