: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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