I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Randomize
