i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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