4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
