Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize