before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize