please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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