and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Randomize