I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
