Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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