OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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