Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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