found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Randomize
