I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
