I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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