I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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