wrigley field is MILF paradise
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
