so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
