? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
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