i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I need to align my fucking chakras
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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