I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
