Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
