I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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