I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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