Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
She tied me up with her honor cords...
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
