If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
