and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Umm I'm too high to move.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
