How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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